Frances Partridge: Anne Chisholm

‘All her life Frances dreaded apathy almost more than anything.  ‘All experience,’ she believed, ‘whether painful or pleasant, can have an essence squeezed out of it which is the main source of happiness…the process of tasting can be good and valuable even when what is tasted is not.’

Frances Partridge was one of the youngest members of ‘Old Bloomsbury’ and the fourth side of an infamous ‘love square’ with Ralph Partridge, Dora Carrington, and Lytton Strachey.  Her life spanned the whole century, she outlived many of her friends by decades, and so by default, she became the keeper of the Bloomsbury flame, especially through her popular diaries.

So there’s huge potential for this book to be crass and gossipy, and then for the seventy years since Strachey and Carrington died to be utterly dull.  So much has been said and written about Bloomsbury already: is there room for any more?  Especially since her diaries have become so well known: if someone has already told their own story in their own words, is there any point in a biographer telling it?

In this case, absolutely yes.  Frances Partridge epitomises the best of Bloomsbury, without the hysterical excesses which caricature it.  She is steadfast, loyal, quietly self-confident, open-minded, discrete, practical.  Where she rejected conventionality, it was not just to be perverse or to attract attention, but because she had thought deeply about what really mattered.  And what really mattered to her was friendship and love, not what other people thought.  People like me, who expend a whole lot of energy obsessing about things and people we can’t control, could learn a lot from Frances.  She is as flawed as the rest of us – her detachment and objectivity towards her husband’s constant infidelity is sometimes baffling – but she is an amazing woman.  The best word I can think of to describe her is ‘courageous’.  This biography is as good on grief, loneliness and the futile battle against old age as it is on standing up for what you believe in.  There is quite a bit of reflection on the ethics and morals of biography: co-operating with biographers which is the kind of loserish thing I like to think about.

Also, apparently in the 1930′s, pregnancy tests were done by injecting a mouse with the woman’s urine.  Chisholm does not record how the mouse told you the result.  SQUEAK – good news? TWO SQUEAKS – bad?

Digression: though I value my family a lot more than Frances valued hers, I appreciated the way that she saw friendship as one of the most important relationships in life.  Recently, many of my friends have been achieving amazing things.  It’s not that I’m surprised by this or that the angsty ‘what am I going to do with myself’ years haven’t been fun, it’s just so great to see people figuring things out and making things happen for themselves. One friend is about to set up a charity.  One is thinking about standing for election.  One just won a national award.  One is shunning a potentially lucrative career in corporate law to follow her heart into public service.  One has just come back from working in Afghanistan.  I am genuinely in awe of them.  Even when things aren’t going well, they pick themselves up and not only get on with it, but put their experiences to positive use.  One friend is having a very difficult pregnancy but is writing about her experiences so that other people know they are not alone.  Another has been working for a horrible boss but instead of complaining, she just said ‘oh well, at least I can learn from this’.  Oh my.  I have mature adults for friends!  You guys rock.

This is what I like best about biography as a genre.  Yes, you can learn an awful lot about human nature and society through fiction, but real people are always more fascinating than imaginary ones.  And actual real people are even better than my biographical real people.

I’m sure I’ll be back to my normal bitter and sarcastic self soon.  Just having a little moment.  Oh, and sorry this was more about me and my friends than Frances and hers.  You know how it is sometimes.

You might also enjoy Hannah’s review.