Wait for Me! Deborah Devonshire

When I was at university, my friend Jen came up with this motto ‘I will not let what is appropriate dictate my behaviour.’ I can’t remember why or how this came about but I think the Mitfords would approve.

I love the Mitfords. Lovelovelovelovelove. I mostly love the way they are all so utterly, unselfconsciously barking. There is a degree of wealth and poshness which allows you to exist entirely in another world – a world where you may or may not choose to take your pet rat to a ball. This is the Mitford world. If I could live anywhere, anytime, anyhow, I would like to be a glamourous 1930′s socialite and hang out with Nancy. She would no doubt be merciless towards me and I would adore her, pathetically.

If you have not heard of the Mitfords, they are summed up in this review as ‘the duchess, the fascist, the communist, the Nazi, the novelist and, er, the other one.’ Debo, author of Wait For Me, is the duchess, having married Andrew, who became the Duke of Devonshire, and owner of the utterly fabulous Chatsworth. Their childhood has been immortalised in the equally utterly fabulous ‘The Pursuit of Love’. If this is all new to you, I wouldn’t suggest you start with this: try either Pursuit, or Mary S Lovell’s excellent ‘The Mitford Sisters’.

Of course, this screaming lack of boundaries does come with its dark side – the three sisters who later became involved in extreme politics are testament to that. But Debo is a perfectly normal, old-skool conservative.

Qualification on ‘perfectly normal’ no.1: When I say perfectly normal, she does have some views which are very much of her era. She seems to have completely accepted that, as a woman, she would be left out of the negotiations about Chatsworth’s future. And she believes that people who are brought up in a family with a tradition of public service are much better placed to be political leaders than those, who, to put it kindly, are ‘born to serve’. No comment on the fact that many of her closest friends, these supposed paragons of public service, who put no effort into their educations and often end up raging alcoholics – not my ideal politician, I have to say.)

Qualification on ‘perfectly normal’ no.2: perfectly normal does not often come with tiaras, I recognise that.

Check out this picture that I took at an exhibition to celebrate her 90th birthday:

Anyway, so, the book. Obviously the childhood stuff is SUPER. I can never get enough of their airing cupboard chats. It is interesting to see how she reconciled her love for her sisters with their views. And the stuff about how she faced up to family tragedy (war deaths, successive miscarriages, her husband’s alcoholism) is all the more moving for being utterly unsentimental and lacking in self-pity. That being said, there are parts that drag, and I like I say, I think this is perhaps more for the real addicts than newbies.

Oooh, oooh, let me post another picture of Chatsworth: