Philippa Gregory – The Red Queen
History would be more fun if Helena was actually The Red Queen
Philippa Gregory is my guilty reading pleasure. I freaking love all those heaving bodices and raunchy kings and power lust. There is crack in those pages, for sure, because the stories are silly and the writing is one-note, but I. Can’t. Get. Enough.
Also I just read some really beasty books, so judge me not.
The main ingredient for Gregory-magic is obsessive heroine set on the pursuit of glory, pausing only for lustful glances and actual lust. This time, it is Margaret Beaufort, who is of ye olde Royale bloode.
But oh no! My House has been deposed and the Baddie White Queen has taken my rightful place! I will complain about this for pages and pages. I will get married a lot, and conveniently, I will become convinced that it is God’s Will that my family takes the throne again. Even when a minor character points out to me how convenient this is, I will not see the irony. I am Margaret Beaufort and I do not do irony. I do dead-eyed determination. And even though my son couldn’t pick me out of a line up and sometimes actually lives with the enemy; these are trivialities compared with God’s Will/My Will.
In Gregory-land, the main character is always assigned a portentous catchphrase, which they get to repeat ominously and endlessly. Here, Margaret gets not one but three motifs – her ‘connection’ with Joan of Arc (said connection being not much more than a major girl crush); her ‘saint’s knees’ which are supposed to remind us that she is very religious (not that we need reminding, because she reminds us every thirty five seconds) and her booming I WILL SIGN MY NAME AS MARGARET R, to remind us that she will be Queen (again, not that we need reminding, because otherwise what would be the point of this book). Gregory has many qualities, but subtle, she is not.
Sadly, this is not Gregory-magic, this is Gregory-by-numbers. The Red Queen is the story of Lancaster vs York from the Lancaster side. We’ve already heard the York story in The White Queen. Which is nice, in theory, except, errr, we’ve already heard this story. It was way more fun from the White Queen’s perspective, because she got to romp around with Sexy King Edward, and Margaret doesn’t do any romping. She has a little snog with her dead husband’s brother, but her heart’s not in it. Margaret is no fun at all. And because she’s all banished and plotting from afar, she hardly ever gets to see any action. Mostly people just tell her what has happened and she says what would Joan do, I have saint’s knees, I will sign my name Margaret R. (You see how this would get tedious?)
So, dull. If you have not read any Gregory don’t start here. If you have, you’ll be reading it anyway, because of the crack in the pages. Likewise, I cannot wait for the final instalment in this trilogy, because we know that Elizabeth of York has been having a steamy affair with her uncle, who is popularly suspected of murdering her brothers, and THAT is what I want from a Gregory heroine.
Posted on March 1, 2011, in Uncategorized and tagged book reviews, books, historical fiction, philippa gregory, the cousins war, the red queen, the tudors, the wars of the roses, the white queen. Bookmark the permalink. 10 Comments.
I did actually enjoy this, but I totally agree that The White Queen was much better. Do love Philippa Gregory tho
You are right, the White Queen had a much more interesting heroine/plot/level of sauciness.
I haven’t got to this yet because I abandoned The White Queen because I was bored. I wanted to be glued to it like I was with The Other Boleyn Girl, but no. So if I was bored with that it sounds like I’d be even more bored with this.
I am thinking of trying the Wideacre trilogy, but there aren’t any kings in it, so that slightly puts me off.
I know Chris likes the Wideacre ones, so they are probably worth giving a go – but I feel a bit like you, I like the upper class raunch.
I haven’t read any Gregory yet (even though my mum keeps telling me I should!) but your review just had me howling with laughter! Thanks for brightening up a dreary morning
Haha, no problem! Aim to please. Your mum is right!
I’ve been disappointed with her last couple of books. They need more cowbell. Her earlier books are much more bonkers and I love that.
Totally. We read it for the bonkers, not for the pretensions at accuracy.
I love these types too. I actually haven’t read Gregorry (I own Boelyn Girl but then the movie came out and I got lazy and watched it instead) but I have had her on my list for awhile. I will read her, absolutely!
By the way… I keep thinking of her every time I see/hear about/ read about Pippa Middleton (name). AND I adorrrrrreeeee Helena Bonham Carter. Fitting that she doesn’t live here in L.A. but rather in glorious London. She’s such a breath of fresh air, isn’t she? At least for this so-cal girl she is. Who knows, maybe you have millions of Bonham Carter types running around over there.
Wallace she lives just down my street! So I quite often see her out and about. She is surprisingly mini in real life – her hair is at least half her height. I WISH we had millions more like her!
You should definitely read Gregory – take her to the beach, she would love it.